Superior Spider-Man #2 Review – Chris’s Take


ssm2covOkay, world — Better hang onto your banana pants! Here comes the Spider-Man!

THE SUPERIOR SPIDER-MAN #2
 “The Peter Principle”
WRITER: Dan Slott
ARTIST: Ryan Stegman
COLORS: Edgar Delgado
LETTERER: VC’s Chris Eliopoulos

PLOT POINTS:

  • Wha-ah? Jameson finally loves Spider-Man . . . when Spider-Man’s really Otto Octavius controlling Peter’s body? OH THE IRONY!
  • Peterpus embarks on a series of dates with Mary Jane, but he just can’t score, so he gets off on Peter’s memories of Mary Jane instead.
  • To free up his time, Peterpus creates spider-bots to patrol the city.
  • Otto dumps Mary Jane, arguing that their relationship “traps” MJ in “an equation that can ever be solved.” Ghost-Peter seems impressed that Otto did what Peter “never could.”
  • The Vulture’s henchmen throw Mary Jane from a height. Otto nearly tries to catch her with a web line, but Peter’s ghost influences him to use a different tactic, probably because Gwen Stacy got her neck snapped that way. Dan Slott subtly leaves the continuity reference not explicit. Not bad.
  • Carlie suspects the truth about Otto and Peter due to the fact that Peter-as-Ock directly told her in Amazing Spider-Man #700 and only an imbecile would not conclude that it’s true based on Peter’s altered behavior. That won’t stop someone in the comics from saying that Marvel is trying to cram her perfection down our throats.
  • The next issue teaser states “The Vulture!” I don’t know whether to take that as a promise or as a threat.

OPINIONS!

This comic made me laugh, but I don’t mean that as a compliment. Let’s start with ghost-Peter’s reaction to Jonah’s newfound spider-fandom:

Screen Shot 2013-01-30 at 12.02.22 PM

 

I know you can’t discern Peter’s speech because the faded lettering used for Peter’s dialogue only becomes legible when you squint yourself into a migraine, so I’ll retype it here: “AHH! I can’t TAKE this anymore! It’s–it’s CRAZY TOWN BANANA PANTS!” According to Stillanerd on the message board, “crazy town banana pants” is a catchphrase from the TV show Community. I didn’t know that because Slott does not credit his source, but I do know that if an insane murderer, who a few months ago bragged about surpassing Pol Pot and Adolf Hitler, killed me and forced my disembodied spirit to eternally watch this evil man relish the fruits of my very existence, then I would choose words other than “it’s crazy town banana pants!” Only Dan Slott can understate and overstate something at the same time. “Crazy town banana pants” is an understatement because it strips the situation of gravitas. It’s an overstatement because only a chimpanzee on Adderall would talk like that.

Ghost-Peter crowds every panel with this exaggerated color commentary, making him the most annoying Jiminy Cricket ever. Friends, it gets embarrassing. When Otto fails to seal the deal with Mary Jane for the fourth time, Peter’s reaction is “RE-JEC-TED! Suck it, Ock!” Uh . . . did Spider-Man just tell Doctor Octopus to “suck it”? Sorry, I know this is a family website. I’m just transcribing what I see. “Suck it.”

Then Otto goes home and summons Peter’s memories of Peter’s experiences with Mary Jane. The dialogue afterwords calls attention to how Otto “slept so soundly” afterwords. Does that mean he . . . y’know . . .

"Bite my lip and close my eyes. Take me away to paradise." -- Green Day

“Bite my lip and close my eyes. Take me away to paradise.” — Green Day

 

Ugh. Must . . . clean . . . brain. You know, I’m getting a little tired of the preoccupation with Doc Ock’s sexuality that Superior and Amazing have had since the mind swap occurred. Give me something else stupid to think about, comic. Here’s one: why is Mary Jane the dumbest person in this comic? Sajani notices something’s odd when Peter passingly uses the word “fetching,” yet Mary Jane suspects nothing after several consecutive issues of Peter’s erratic and uncharacteristic behavior, and his blatantly talking like a cartoon super villain. Even ghost-Peter decries her not even flinching when Peterpus declares that “everything’s proceeding according to plan” in the middle of a date. Didn’t Mary Jane once see through the Chameleon’s disguise as Peter almost immediately? As the character closest to Peter, she should exhibit the most sensitivity toward subtle (or extremely unsubtle) differences in his personality.

Mary Jane and Carlie have a friendship that apparently involves nothing other than sitting at a coffee table and talking about Peter. There’s a similar relationship between the ex-wives of Prince Charming in the Fables comic. Do women actually form clubs where they get together and chat about a man they’ve mutually dated? On the other hand, I have a theory that Carlie secretly wants Mary Jane dead. Why else would she not report to Mary Jane Peter-as-Doc Ock’s clear and obviously true statement that he had traded brains with Otto? The only other reason I can think of for her depravedly reckless communication failure is that rational behavior by Carlie would blow apart the scotch tape holding this plot together.

RATING: 1.5 bananas out of 5.

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(18) Comments

  1. krankyboy

    @12 - I just don't even know what to say anymore. Honestly, I'd call this bad fan fiction, but I think it'd be an insult to bad fan fiction.

  2. Dan

    I like the idea of seeing Peter Parker not being in a committed relationship, post-OMD after MJ broke up with him. It would have been nice to see Peter's relationship with Betty Brant and Liz Allan get some development during the past 5 years while Mary Jane was on hiatus. This is the angle that I wanted to see. In addition, I wanted to see Peter Parker dating a super heroine like Black Widow, Jeniffer Walters, Jessica Drew, and Betsy Braddock in addition to Carol Danvers on the Pals level respectively because I feel that those types of close friendship would open doors to the types of stories that we have seen in Spider-Man's world. It's too bad that Dan Slott is not interested with developing those types of stories as it doesn't have to lead to a committed relationship. It would be an interesting alternate to the Black Cat as Spidey's partner in a story arc. So far, we have only seen Peter Parker and Carol Danvers. It would be nice to see it expand towards the other heroines I have mentioned because if they got to know Peter Parker instead of his Spider-Man ego, they would learn to tolerate him because they would realize that he's just like them as far as personal experience and character are concerned.

  3. Ed K.

    Chris, just wanted to say you're a regular Rumplestiltskin, spinning crappy straw into comedic gold! Very well done review.

  4. Spec Spider Fan

    Ah, Ock playing with his _ock via PP's proxy.....this is what comics are about...dear Lord.......good reviews, however.....will still hold tightly on to my wallet as far as this series is concerned.

  5. Peter Perverto

    But seriously, I can’t believe Spider-man titles have fallen so low that the only drama in the them is whether or not Doc Ock fucks MJ or not.

  6. Peter Perverto

    I am a pervert and I love Spider-Man titles because they contain rape, torture and …. masturbation.

  7. Kent Larson

    One possibility for MJ vindication: She knows. Since her first encounter with PeterPus she's been biding her time and staying close to control and monitor the situation. She's just looking for a chance to act once she figures out what to do about her poor possessed former lover and current good friend. Thanks for the great reviews with honest, well thought out criticism when warranted. I greatly appreciate this site.

  8. stillanerd

    Great review, Chris. If I may ask a question: now that we've had at least 5 issues (the last three Amazing Spider-Man and two Superior Spider-Man) with SpOck, do you still think Doc Ock in Peter's body pretending to be both Peter and Spider-Man is still a good idea, or do you think the main problem is how Dan Slott is writing it?

  9. Kevin Cushing

    Well done, Chris. Glad you spent a little time on the line that stuck out to me as the most glaringly out of place line ever - yeah, the one with the bananas. I can't even bring myself to say it. What's worse is, after I got over the "what did I just read?" I turned the page to find MJ saying the same line and both her and Carlie claiming it's a catchphrase of Peter's. Sorry, no.

  10. Donovan Grant

    Yeah, agreed. This thing was a farce and I couldn't take it seriously. #700 ended on such a suppoesdly heavy note, and so far all we've got are cartoon hi-jinks.

  11. Symbiotic_€vO

    Whats the point of this now? Yost gave me some hope in this new status quo with his take on Avenging but nothing is really happening, this is the worlds horniest, frustrated and boring "super hero" not even a Army of jedi ghosts could save this fiasco

  12. Xonathan

    It could be that Carlie wants her facts straight before telling MJ. Be 100% sure. She's a detective or something after all... Then again Slott can write whatever he thinks would drive the story where he wants to. Who needs normal behavior and logic, right?

  13. Bertone

    I'm surprised that during all their dates, MJ never once thought to say "By the way Carlie is injured and I've been letting her live with me". You'd think it would come up.

  14. Erik Lexie

    "It’s an overstatement because only a chimpanzee on Adderall would talk like that" had me in stitches.

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