“Stand Back Baby Cause Brad’s Hulkin’ Out!” — Brad Douglas
In an out-of-the-blue move this week Brad Douglas (webmaster of the Spider-Man Crawlspace) quietly informed his site admins, podcast panelists and site reviewers and contributors that he is ending the Spider-Man Crawlspace website and starting a Hulk website and podcast in its place.
“It’s been a wild ride, and quite a long one, but let’s face it. Hulk’s where it’s at,” the Crawlspace webmaster told his admins. “I’ve wrestled with this for a long time but this is the right course for me and the site. It will finally allow me to properly explore Hulk cosplay, like I’ve always wanted to do, and to cover topics that actually interest people. You know, Hulk stuff.”
Douglas also expressed an interest in changing and expanding the podcast panel. “I’m dumping Fettinger and Berryman,” he said in a private email to his staff. “All they ever want to do is talk about Spider-Man, Osborn, Stegron or hippies, just yadda yadda yadda. It’s old news. I’m bringing in a friend of mine named Carl that I met down the street at the Joplin 7-11. He’s a Trappist monk who has taken a vow of silence, and he’s part Asian on his step-mom’s side. I’m also letting my beagle step in as a panelist and reviewer. My daughter Ava will take over for George on the Satellite Reviews and Friday Night Fight podcasts.”
Zach Joiner offered to buy the site from Douglas but he could not gather the funds. He later released the following quote on his website, Spidey-Dude.com:
“Brad asked for $1.5 million, all Canadian. My starting bid was $278.62. We haggled for about 90 seconds before realizing there just wasn’t common ground to reach on a deal. He offered to come to Texas and let me wrestle him for the site but I had to decline since his terms were ‘to the death.’ Also, that kind of brawl could result in permanent scarring, which could aversely affect my career as a male model.”
Crawlspace podcast panelist Michael Bailey, who is also a noted Superman and DC podcaster, was asked to stay on for the new Hulk podcast. “People love him, and he loves Hulk,” said Douglas. Bailey himself replied to Douglas’s email announcement. “I’m the guy the gals tune in to hear,” Bailey said. “Of course Brad’s keeping me around. When you’re a butcher in a grocery store you keep your prime cuts at the front of the display counter window. Podcasting is no different than workin’ meat and Brad Douglas knows that better than anyone.”
Douglas also went into more detail about the remaining podcast panelists. “As for Fettinger and Berryman, I don’t know what they’ll do. Move to Flordia I guess. Isn’t that where they send old dudes?”
“Well it was fun while it lasted. Fettinger and I are going to keep going forward though. We feel like we owe it to the Wallcrawler, especially after this fiasco. J.R. and I will be starting a new website and video podcast called Dudes In Robes Talk Spidey – DIRTS for short. All we know is it’ll be subscription based because damn, being this awesome ain’t cheap. More details coming soon, including consumer-friendly monthly and yearly pricing models. A subscription will also provide access to my private IRC channel where I talk about bacon and Christina Hendricks.”
In the email sent to his staff announcing the changes, which take effect April 31st of this year, Douglas said the new Hulk site would be called Hulk Smashspace: The Strongest Hulk Site There Is. He also announced that the name of the podcast itself would be changed from Spider-Man Crawlspace Podcast to It’s Not Easy Being Green: The Hulk’s Incredible Podcast.
“I’m really excited about this,” Douglas said in his email. “I know that you are all excited as well. And if not then hey – it sucks to be you, fool!”
In ending his email announcement Douglas finished with a link to a YouTube video showing a quick teaser for the new Hulk-centric site and podcast.
–George Berryman! (Signing Off!)