THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #654.1 Review

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #654.1

“Flashpoint”

Writer: Dan Slott

Penciler: Humberto Ramos

Inker: Carlos Cuevas

Colorist: Edgar Delgado

“Coming Up In Amazing Spider-Man”

Writer: Dan Slott

Penciler: Stefano Caselli

Inker: ???

Colorist: ???

Cover Art: Paolo Siqueira

Be warned – there are SPOILERS ahead!

And now, for something a little different …

From the very beginning, it was clear that this issue would essentially be Venom #0 – a prelude to the upcoming ongoing by Rick Remender and Tony Moore.  As such, CrazyChris decided to take pity on me and help out on the review, Marvel Team-Up style!

Hey everyone! When I offered to review the ongoing Venom series, I had no idea who would be under the costume or what I was in for. Anyhow, let’s review this thing, symbiotic-style!

Due to some unforeseen technical problems (in other words, my scanner has gremlins), I can’t add any scans at the moment.  I’ll update this review with some scans tomorrow.  Sorry!

The Plot

Newly minted government operative Flash Thompson, the new Venom, begins his infiltration of the group Ultimatum at a swanky party attended by financial movers and shakers from around the globe.  He plants a tracking device on a countess and then returns to base to be separated from the symbiote, which he must do within 48 hours of putting it on.  Back home in Brooklyn, Betty arrives to inform Flash that Marla Jameson has just died and that he needs to speak to and console Peter.  Flash heads to the Coffee Bean to meet Peter, but he sees Peter with Mary Jane (and not Carlie Cooper) and becomes angry.  His boss General Dodge calls and informs Flash of another mission, and soon Flash is skydiving into Turkey to save Yusef Kassim, an Arab banker that he met at the party that opened the story.  Flash successfully infiltrates the base and gets Kassim, but Flag-Smasher successfully blows up Flash’s symbiote legs, causing Flash to lose concentration and allow the symbiote to fully take over.  The Venomed-out Flash slaughters the goons and bites Flag-Smasher’s arm off, allowing him to escape with Kassim.  Later, Kassim lies to cover Flash to his superiors, and it’s discovered that the symbiote did not completely separate from him after the mission.  Returning home, Flash is scolded by Betty for missing the funeral and not talking to Peter, but she quickly changes face when Flash promises to try to be a better man.

There is also a two-page teaser for upcoming Spider-Man stories that appears to have been drawn by Stefano Caselli, though no credits are given.

The Good

Um … the book was $2.99?

I agree with you, Gerard, that this issue does little if anything well, but I see it as one of the rare comics that transcend mere awfulness and enter so-stupid-it’s-funny territory. Does that justify buying the issue? No. Readers, please don’t take anything I say as a suggestion to go see this for yourself. It’s not worth it. But for those of us who HAVE to read this in order to review it, there’s some fun to be had marveling at how utterly dumb it is.

For example, after Flash Venoms-out — no, wait. I can’t even finish that sentence. Come on, “Venom-out?” Is that what it’s called, now? Did this issue coin that? I can’t even say it without feeling dumber. Anyway, (deep breath) after Flash Venoms-out (ugh), Flag Smasher says he’ll blow his hostage apart with a detonator and asks Flash if he understands. Venomed-out Flash replies “Ssssory, we’re just a big dumb jock. Give usss a sssec to wrap our head around it.” Did I mention Venom talks like Stegron, now? Then Venom-Flash bites Flag Smasher’s arm off, spits it out, and says it doesn’t count as cannibalism because he didn’t swallow. Seriously, Flash freaking Thompson is doing this. Yes, it utterly obliterates any dignity this character ever had, yet I can’t get mad about it. It’s so pitifully stupid that I can only laugh.

One moment actually made me laugh out loud. A little earlier in the issue, Flash jumps from a plane and starts gliding with these purple bat wing flaps in his armpits. The image is so ridiculous that I did that thing where you laugh abruptly and open your mouth too late so it comes out as a buzzing raspberry sound. Other than that, though, I like design of Flash’s normal, non-Venomed-out costume. It might be the coolest variant on the black Spider-Man suit ever.

I agree with you that that design of the “special ops” Venom is actually pretty cool, though Ramos doesn’t do a good job drawing it.  Tony Moore will do a much better job when Venom begins next month.

The Bad

Man oh man, where do I start with this one?  The problems begin right from the cover to the issue.  The cover depicts a rather enormous, Gargan-esque Venom swinging behind Spider-Man.  It’s not a bad drawing – in fact, I kind of like it for what it is.  The problem is that (a) no such event occurs in the issue, (b) the Venom design shown is not used in the issue, with Ramos instead using a more Brock-like design, and (c) Spider-Man doesn’t even appear in the goddamn issue!  In fact, Peter himself only appears in a single panel.  This is supposed to be The Amazing Spider-Man, right?  Anyway, enough of that … if I’m going to nitpick that much, we’ll be here all day.

The opening of the issue isn’t terrible, but it seems awfully familiar to me, as if I’ve seen it before …

Oh, right.  It’s basically the opening scene of the 1994 Arnold Schwarzenegger action/comedy True LiesHarry Tasker Flash sneaks into a party, pretends to be somebody important, mingles with foreign dignitaries and financiers, and dances with the chick secretly working for the bad guys.  The only difference is that Slott outright tells us that Juno Skinner Countess Bianca Demonico is working for the bad guys, sucking any mystery out of the character.  Sadly, this is the best part of the issue.

Really, the biggest problem with the issue is that for a story about Flash as the new Venom, the story gives no real reason why any of this makes any sense, and the character resembles neither Flash nor Venom for most of the story.  Flash is terribly out of character here, as his characterization is all over the map even when completely separated from the symbiote.  Slott attempts to cover this up with heavy-handed use of football talk, but it fails miserably and becomes annoying very quickly.  Why does Flash, being the huge Spidey fanatic that he is, agree to be bonded to the alien symbiote worn by one of Spider-Man’s mortal enemies?  Why is the government using a stolen symbiote as a weapon to begin with?  Why is a winner of the Congressional Medal of Honor, somebody that has been on television, in newspapers, and all over the Internet fairly recently, making no attempt to conceal his identity while purportedly working undercover at a swanky dinner party?  And where the hell is Spider-Man during all of this?  This IS The Amazing Spider-Man, right?

Though there were no really outstanding positives, I wasn’t convinced that this was a bad issue until I reached the last few pages of the story.  First, Flash’s legs are blown off by the Flag-Smasher, and though he can assumedly regenerate them with the symbiote, Flash loses control and goes full-on Venom.  Then, he mercilessly slaughters the mooks and bites off the Flag-Smasher’s freaking arm, spitting it out afterwards.  (Rated 9 and Up!)  Not only is the art on these pages the worst in an already unevenly-illustrated issue, but Flash suddenly takes a dive into villain territory from which he never recovers.  Although we learn that the symbiote is only 1% bonded to him at this point – and thus, logically, he should still be Flash with only the slightest twinge of evil in his heart – he is shown having no remorse whatsoever for what he did and hides the truth from his superiors.  This doesn’t inspire me to want to read about his adventures on a monthly basis.

The final indignity comes courtesy of Bertone’s nemesis Betty Brant, who once again proves that she is in fact a horrible person.  Betty gets annoyed with Flash for missing Marla Jameson’s funeral – despite the fact that she never actually told him any details about it – and claims that people were asking about him.  Wait … what?  Why would people be looking for Flash Thompson at Marla’s funeral?  Flash barely had any relationship with the Jameson family at all.  As it is, it already strains credibility that multiple people would be wondering where he is at an emotionally-charged event like a funeral.  I could see that making sense if, say, John Jameson hadn’t attended, but Flash Thompson?  Additionally, where does Betty come off getting on his case about this to begin with?  There’s no particularly compelling reason why he needed to attend the funeral in the first place, and getting angry with him about not talking to Peter seems disingenuous given that Betty has a much closer relationship to Peter.  Really, this scene was contrived solely to generate some false drama.

I agree with your points about Slott’s poor characterization of Flash, and I would that add his habit of comparing his missions to football comes off as extremely inappropriate given the context. I get that Flash is a soldier and it’s his job to kill people, but you’d think after losing his legs he wouldn’t nonchalantly put war in the same category as high school sports. He’s literally thinking about scoring touchdowns while shooting three men in the head and strangling a fourth with a wire. I don’t know if Slott was trying to “keep it light” or if he just can’t write well enough to make Flash sound like Flash without having him constantly allude to football, but by golly there isn’t an ounce of sincerity in this issue.

The art doesn’t help. There’s another scene where Flash tries to get out of his wheel chair but falls on his face because he forgot he doesn’t have legs any more. I think Slott was attempting an emotional moment to show us how dire Flash’s life has become in contrast with the liberation the symbiote gives him, but Ramos’s style has no subtlety so it comes off as a tasteless slapstick image.

Also, I’m surprised that you didn’t talk more about Flash joining the list of people who just ADORE Carlie Cooper. It’s so great that Peter FINALLY has a reliable gal and all his ducks in a row, eh Gerard?

YOU BASTARD.  You just had to remind me of that, didn’t you?  I swear, my mind must have blocked that Carlie Cooper bit out to spare me the pain and anguish, but you just felt the need to remind me.

The Ugly

The entire concept of Marvel’s “Point One” books is supposedly to provide a good jumping-on point for new readers.  Viewing the book from that angle, this issue fails in every conceivable fashion.

Not only is the Amazing Spider-Man nowhere to be found in this “new-reader-friendly” issue of The Amazing Spider-Man, but Peter Parker only shows up for a single panel.  Let me reiterate: in an issue designed solely to appeal to new readers, the main character of the series only appears in a single panel.  This issue is basically a pilot story for the new Venom, which flies in the face of the entire Point One initiative.  It’s like sending your kid to a basketball camp in which the only sport they ever discuss is racquetball.

Also, for a book that’s supposed to be easy to pick up for somebody unfamiliar with the current goings-on in the title, this issue is submerged up to the neck in the series’ current continuity and status quo.  Marla Jameson’s death – which occurred only last issue – is a major plot point, and it’s the only motivation behind Betty’s actions in this issue.  This may as well be The Amazing Spider-Man #655, because the story seems to have continued straight from last issue.  Except that it isn’t, because Spider-Man is nowhere to be seen.

It’s like Marvel doesn’t know its waltz from its cha cha!

I see what you did there.

The Bottom Line

I really tried to enjoy the issue, but I just couldn’t.  It’s a sloppily written, sloppily drawn mess slapped together to advertise another series and squeeze an extra three bucks out of the readers.  0.5 out of 5 webheads.

I don’t know what I’d rate this. It’s bad, but kind of fun at the same time. If I had any emotional investment in these characters, I’d hate what’s being done to them, but that ship sank years ago. I can get no madder at this than one could get mad at the kid who falls off the swing set and poops himself. It’s a little pathetic and a lot funny. I won’t contest Gerard’s rating, but give it an extra .1 on me.

This reminds me of that Wicker Man remake with Nicholas Cage: it’s so shitty that it’s unintentionally funny, yet it’s impossible to actually recommend on that basis alone.  NOOOOO!!!  NOT THE BEEEEES!!!

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30 Comments

  1. The horror…..

    Screw it. I won’t be buying Spiderman for sure.

    Slott please quit.

    I’m sorry but I can’t bear this. And this is based on others reviews…..

  2. @#23 Pretty sure you nailed it there, that’s exactly how I took it and that would have it make more sense since we know Flash wouldn’t normally do that.

    I liked this issue but certainly didn’t love it. Still, way better than a 0.5/5. One thing I do agree on is that Spider-man should have had more of a part in this book…well he should have had a part in this book, but I do think this book is going to have a major impact on upcoming ASM issues so I guess it will serve it’s purpose for that.

  3. Of course people are going to be asking where Betty’s boyfriend is. I actually liked this issue, though I’m not a huge Venom fan. Slott did a great job using irony to contrast Flash’s new life with Pete’s life.

  4. @Two-Bit Specialist.
    You are right. I forgot about those two events…. But since peaople weren’t bond to the symbiots for long, they didnt know fully what it might mean ?

  5. I thought that the issue was so-so. I expected it to be a pilot for Flash / Venom, and so I did not expect to see Spider-Man in it. I’m used to covers of comic books hyperbolizing or misrepresenting the interior content. It’s common practice for every title I’ve ever read from any comic book company. I’m not saying it’s done on every issue. I’m just saying it’s common-place.

    I agree w/ Sthenurus that the blowing off of the legs caused Flash to re-live his traumatic experience and could cause the anger/rage/evil feelings to be the catalyst for the Venom symbiote to gain more control of Flash’s actions. I also agree, however, that this type of incident occurred too soon in the story line. I think I understand why the creators did this. They want the reader to see what could happend to Flash if he loses control. I just think they went too far for a first-time incident. What the book could have done a little better was make Flash feel more remorse about that action, or not be aware that it had occurred – similar to how Spidey used to go out web-swinging for hours w/ the symbiote in control and not remember.

    In addition, I think it makes sense that if a person’s girlfriend (Betty) goes to a funeral, a natural question for others in attendance who know the couple would be to ask where her boyfriend was. Flash might not know Marla, but Betty does, and he’s her boyfriend. He should have been there to at least support her.

    I agree that there should be more of an explanation as to why anyone in the government would think that using the symbiote is a good idea. For a powerful entity, it has some serious “kryptonite-esque” weeknesses that are readily available to almost anyone (sound / fire). And the danger of the symbiote gaining control of it’s host is well established. I’m not saying that these things can’t be explained away. I’m saying that the writers need to try to do it.

    I didn’t hate it. It just felt rushed. I think we’re being force fed the premise, and perhaps the on-going will be better because they will slow down the story telling a little, and allow the characters to grow.

    Of course this is my beef w/ most comics these days. I’m 40 so I started buying comics when they cost 60 cents and each issue had WAAAYYYY more story. It’s a trade off, I guess. The art is much better these days…ah well.

  6. One more thing about flash “venom-out” (urgh) episode. It happened after his legs got blown up. So my guess is the psychological trauma to relieve his experience was enough to let him slip into a blind rage, allowing the symbiote to take over and start the bonding…

  7. I want to agree with Sthenurus’ theory, since I do think the whole symbiote background is not very well known either, but you gotta remember that New York has been hit twice by city-wide symbiote assaults (ASM’s Planet of the Symbiotes and Mighty Avengers’ Venom Bomb).

  8. Thanks alot for the response CrazyChris, very insightful as usual. I’m not reading ASM anymore, so everything I know comes from the reviews here and Spiderfan. I don’t get to see all the details that are presented in the story, but the whole Venom/Flash storyline seems to be lacking a lot of info. The idea that the government would endorse the Venom symbiote as a govnt agent is so fraught with problems and defies any explanation as to why logical-thinking scientist(s) would endorse something that has continually gone so horribly wrong in the past (ie Venom, Carnage, Venom II, etc). Its akin to them saying, “here sniff some benzene and despite the fact that all other attempts to sniff benzene have led to death/cancer, this time may be different!!” If they’re hurting for superpowered agents so badly, why not just endorse mutant growth hormone? Or find some way of lobotomizing the symbiote so you get its strength and not its mental desire to eat people and/or their body parts? Or better yet, just use Toxin!…he’s supposed to be the ‘good’ symbiote…iirc…

  9. I think the reason for flash to accept this, beyond “recovering” his leg is that the whole symbiote story might not be well knowed by the citizen of the marvel universe. Remember when Osborn used Gargan as “his” Spider-man? Nobody seemed to know it wasn’t him. So, once presented with the opportunity to bound with the venom symbiot, Flash might just think its the same thing that gives spidey his powers, without knowing the side effects full well… As for flash ripping people arms, i can feel a new maximum carnage starting: take a character that could be interesting, turn it into a gore fest and forget about it for a couple of years…

  10. @Doc Folsome: You’re right that it might have been interesting if we had drastically different opinions and got a debate going, but we can’t help having the opinions we have. We had this planned since over a week before the issue came out, so its not like we could have coordinated to get one positive and one negative review. The point was more that this was a crossover between the titles Gerard and I are reviewing so we thought it would be fun to team up in a review. And for what it’s worth, I don’t HATE the issue as much as Gerard. 0.5 is something I would only give to a book that makes me physically ill and this issue only made me laugh at its stupidity. But, like Gerard, I fall on the “don’t buy” side of the “buy”/”don’t buy” divide. I wasn’t going to start an argument over HOW MUCH we disliked the issue.

    Here are my answers to your two other questions:
    1. That might be a reasonable explanation (maaaaybe), but I think Gerard’s beef was that there was NO explanation given in the actual story whatsoever.
    2. I don’t care much about ratings at all. If I were a kid or a parent, then I might want a better rating system, but I’m not going to get mad about how poor Marvel is at raising other people’s children. No, my problem with the arm biting is simply that its a dumb thing to have Flash Thompson do. That’s not his character. And whenever a story goes the “symbiote brings out your dark side” route, its better for it to be subtle. In the 90s Spider-Man cartoon, you got to see Peter turn darker over time when he got the symbiote. At first, he reveled in the power but slowly but surely he started doing things we know he wouldn’t normally do. By the time Peter realized it himself, he had almost gone too far. In this Flash Thompson story, however, he’s biting people’s arm’s off on his second mission. Its skipping over the more methodical execution this potentially fascinating character arc deserves.

  11. The book was terrible, i thought at least they would try to bring a dynamic to the introduction of the new Venom as they do with new characters but as as with the rest of Spider-Man now and days, it even fails to do that.

    Is it me or did Ramos work here seem rushed, less defined than his work in the previous stuff he did in this book.

  12. I did a quick first pass through this review and i thought Gerard’s personality had fissioned off into two distinct entities…then i realized it was CrazyChris writing…two opinions are interesting…but it may be better if one of them enjoyed the book, that way you get a point/counterpoint thing going…ah well…

    Two questions…
    1. Couldn’t Flash have picked up the guise of Venom (his idol’s sworn enemy) b/c he recalled the team-ups Brock and Spidey had in the past, or that he may want to make something right out of what went wrong in the past?…just a thought, i think its within reason that Flash became Venom even though (like i said before) his handicap alone makes him intriguing…

    2. I just want to clarify the beef you both share with the arm biting…do you prefer the book be less graphic or that the ‘9+’ label be removed? just curious…

  13. I’m shock at the review. Not knocking you, as it’s your opinion, but I loved this issue.

    I wish whatever Slott was on when he wrote this he’d take when he writes Amazing it was a completely different tone to the main book. My disappointment is that it had nothing to do with Peter/Spider-man and is not a good introduction to the main series.

    Other than that it was great fun. I thought Romas drew Flash/Agent Venom and full-Venom all equally well. I liked how Slott has introduced use to Venom’s handlers and hinting that this might not be as straight forward as they and Flash hoped.

    I thought Flash was in character, as far as I know. Apart from when he “Venom-out” (I admit that does sound stupid), but when he attacked Flag-Smasher it was obvious he wasn’t in control. That was pure Venom.

  14. When I heard of this concept I thought is sounded stupid but I could see what they were trying to do, give spideys biggest fans a play on “with great power comes…” and have him try try and use the venom symbiote for good, especially spurred by the idea of regaining the ability to walk, all the while fighting the suits personality and looking up to his idol (spidey) for the strength to reject the suits evil influence. He’d go on missions op style and use features like the blending into scenery and the wallcrawling, I could even see this being an plot point how the suit is having more and more influence over Flash and he slowly loses himself to the symbiote and doesn’t know what he’s becoming anymore. In short I imagined this would be the secret agent story they advertised it to be.

    Instead it seems Slott can’t even write an in-character plot like that and has to completely damage the character of Flash, Flash understands there are casualties of war but much like Spider-man ripping the skin off Kraven’s face with his sticky powers this comes off like a “Only a complete fucking psychopath who is seriously sick in the head would do that moment.” How is spidey gonna justify working with someone that bites their arms off exactly?

  15. We should see more team-ups on reviews around here. Wait, is the Crawlspace turning into another Amazing Spider-Man title?? 😛

    I liked the issue personally. I will say it wasn’t the best, some panels looked like Flash was getting fatter in the symbiote outfit, didn’t exactly care for Betty here and I don’t get how this was a good jumping on point for if you want to read ASM. This was decent if you want to read Venom, but for Spidey? This seemed more of a push for Flash’s title. On the other hand I’m probably the few that didn’t mind, I’ll be picking up Venom.

  16. I’m kinda curious about something…

    … while we can pretty much figure out why the Braintrust went with Flash Thompson, what’s the government’s excuse?

  17. “So maybe she a little embarrassed for herself that she was there without him. I dunno.”

    That sounds like Betty Brant…making the funeral all about her and her feelings.

  18. Great review. I like the tag-team style. I went to my LCS today to see if I had any comics and they had this one in my pile since I have regular Amazing. I flipped through the pages real quick and told them I didn’t want it. Looks like I made a good decision.

    Since I didn’t read it, I can’t speak too openly about this then but the whole Betty relationship while he’s doing this secret ops thing seems like it’d be a problem. She doesn’t know he’s doing it correct? It’s like super covert? Seems like that will be tough to do for Flash. And as far as the funeral thing goes, my initial thought was that Betty was probably talking about people asking her where Flash was, since by now most people probably know they’re back together and they’d assume he’d be there for her. So maybe she a little embarrassed for herself that she was there without him. I dunno.

  19. I feel ripped off by this, pre-ordered a couple of copies as gifts for my nephews thinking it would be a nice “jumping on” issue.

  20. I don’t care for the way Venom appears on the cover. McFarlane Venom was by far the best, and it worked somewhat better as it was shown over and over how Brock worked hard to get bulky. Flash may be muscular, but not as Brock was. Just my opinion.

    Once again, this is a book for ages 9 and up? Terrible. I don’t entirely fault Slott for writing the limb biting in, but come on Mr Wacker, children might be reading this and biting off/losing limbs is not something I can ever recall even coming close to happening in Amazing Spider-Man when I was a lad. I would assume you would have had the same thought when you were editing it, but if you didn’t, we obviously have two totally different viewpoints on what kids can and should be exposed to. Absolutely shameful.

  21. “Then Venom-Flash bites Flag Smasher’s arm off, spits it out, and says it doesn’t count as cannibalism because he didn’t swallow. Seriously, Flash freaking Thompson is doing this. Yes, it utterly obliterates any dignity this character ever had, yet I can’t get mad about it. It’s so pitifully stupid that I can only laugh.”

    This brings home to me why I feel funny about this. That isn’t Flash Thompson….Sha Shan slapping aside.

    “Why would people be looking for Flash Thompson at Marla’s funeral?”

    FOR REAL

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