Amazing Spider-Man (2015) #3 Review: AndrewRoebuck’s Take

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Illogical Fights, and Racist War Lords are abound in this episode of The 60’s Spider-Man show….wait apparently this is from 2015…Uh-Oh.

Writer: Dan Slott
Pencils: Giuseppe Camuncoli
Inks: Cam Smith
Colorist: Marte Gracia
Cover Artist: Alex Ross
Letters: VC’s Chris Eliopoulos
Editor: Nick Lowe

PLOT: Our issue begins with Scorpio, one of the heads of the Zodiac cult getting his horoscope told to him as he plans his next mission. The two little individuals who are telling him his horoscope instruct him he needs to act now or he will lose everything. So Scorpio and the rest of the zodiacs prepare for an all out assault. Meanwhile Peter Parker is on the news debuting his latest acquisition The Baxter Building, which has been relabelled under the Parker Industries Banner. Johnny Storm aka The Human Torch sees the announcement on the news, and begins to get enraged. He breaks into the building formerly known as Baxter and attempts to beat the snot out of Spider-Man. The two fight for a brief period of time, until Spider-Man manages to calm Johnny down in order to show him around the building. Peter lets Johnny meet up with the head honcho of the building Harry Osborne who has changed his name to Harry Lyman after his mothers maiden name to avoid his connection with his father Norman. Then Peter shows Johnny his garage which for some reason sends him into another flaming rage. Clash dons some of his old super villain gear and attempts to save Spider-Man from The HumanScreenshot from 2015-11-04 16:29:48 Torch. Spider-Man quickly changes back into his civilian garb and once again diffuses the confrontation. He then shows Johnny the front lobby of the building which has statues of The Fantastic Four, and he explains he purchased it to keep it safe until The Fantastic Four returns. In the other plotline Scorpio launches an assault on The Helicarrier which he uses to take the decrypted data, and to kill Leo for his failure. The issue ends with an african warlord hiring what appears to be Norman Osborne to remove Parker Industries from his country.

STORY: This issue is one of those issues you’ve probably read before, because its essentially a 70s comic. Two heroes have a silly pointless dispute, that is easily solved by the end of the issue. I mean seriously for the conceit to even work in modern day Johnny Storm would have to be completely hammered. Why else would he for no reason fly off the handle? He puts countless lives in danger because someone has bought his old building? I don’t mind the ending message of The Fantastic Four not being dead but that should have been how the issue began, and have the rest of it go on from there. Slott has written great interactions between the two before, and shown he understands the characters but not here. Here it just seems like complete filler, with a few entertaining moments. I did enjoy Spidey capturing torch in the exact same tube he fought through in Amazing Fantasy 15 but its a one off joke. Bottom line with the modern day attitudes of both characters, and their deep friendship there shouldn’t be any fight scene.

The subplot with the Scorpio attack also seemed rather insignificant and oddly unrealistic. My favorite element being the Twin Fairies at the beginning just because it seemed like something straight out of a Godzilla movie. Shield doesn’t bother to backup any of its files, and Scorpio makes a big deal about not leaving any traces behind. He includes biological aspects specifically mentioning “cells”. But we’ve seen that Leo only had a cynaide Screenshot from 2015-11-04 16:32:49capsule with him, so he definitely would have left behind I don’t know…a body? Don’t go overboard on monologuing to dead bodies if you aren’t going to be truthful.

The final stinger in this issue is particularly troubling. It’s actually a pretty stereotypical, and racist view of an “African” Warlord. The warlord is dressed almost identically to many real life parallels and seems just a tad bit offensive. This also gets heavily into political territory that might be unwise for Slott to tread into. The impotence is that Parker Industries has been giving away free energy to a country ruled by a totalitarian government. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it breaks all kinds of trade embargo’s, and would be a very unwise thing for a company to do. Unless it has the sanction of the United Nations which isn’t really hinted at. Is his company messing around with all kinds of countries liberties? Also why would Osborn be decked out in a goblin nation ring, can we make it any more obvious as to who you want us to believe this is?

Overall this is an issue you would probably be best reading a summary of and getting on with your day. Its just more filler as we slowly continue to chug the story along. Unlike past issues we don’t really get any witty banter to enjoy, and the characters don’t act very intelligent. So I wouldn’t recommend it.

C

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27 Comments

  1. @26
    I’m glad you got it to work again; it’s a great feature. It’s a lot easier to visit a page when you know there are more responses to read, rather than having to bookmark it, or click through other posts before getting to the intended location.

  2. @Jason, glad you like the notify me by email feature. I use a program called “jetpack” for wordpress. Some features had been crashing my front page so I had to eliminate some of them. However just recently I figured out how to get them back. I’m amazed how many people use that feature.

  3. In case anyone is still reading comments two weeks after the issue was released, here are my thoughts:

    I don’t think the recap page is the place to give readers NEW information. The Ben Parker Foundation? I don’t recall ever reading about this. If someone can cite differently…

    How did Johnny Storm not know the place he called home was one, up for sale, and two, purchased by Peter Parker?

    As someone who doesn’t read The Fantastic Four, what happened to them? I can only guess it has something to do with Secret Wars, but since the past hasn’t caught up to the present, that question still hasn’t been answered. Way to go Marvel. Bunch of idiots. Even if the answer has nothing to do with Secret Wars, the series should have ended before the “All New Marvel” began.

    Other than those three points, it wasn’t a terrible issue. I always love a good quarrel between Johnny and Peter. Can’t wait to see what’s in store for Norman.

  4. @#17: The No Prize existed to cover up MISTAKES because Stan was forgetful and writing almost EVERYTHING at the time. There is a huge difference between that and not bothering to provide a vital piece of information on the grounds that readers could just figure it out by themselves. there are mistakes and then there are mistakes you know

  5. I’m sorry, but unless I missed something, like the fact that they are non-lethal, is no one else put off at the idea of Spider-Man developing actual weapons? I know it’s for SHIELD but SHIELD haven’t got a clean track record and even if they did how many times have they either come close to or outright been taken over or infiltrated?

    Hell, NORMAN OSBORN, basically took them over back in the day right? And in Slott’s own run Peter encountered his own harmless inventions weaponized and (stupidly) blamed himself for their immoral use.

    Is he REALLY going to sanction or personally design actual weapons for a massive military organization like SHIELD?

  6. If there’s one constant in Slott’s endless Spider-Man run, it’s that he is in such a breathless hurry to get to the next mega-arc, the next status quo, the next new #1, that he doesn’t care to properly finish or coherently tidy up certain plots he’s already juggling.

  7. #19

    The problem as I see it is Dan Slott thinks his audience is mentally about eight years old, and a not particularly perceptive eight years old at that. All that matters is “kewl” fights and scenarios the eight year olds can act out with their action figure playsets (buy them all!). it also explains why Peter’s relationships are so puerile and juvenile. An eight year old would get the “hubba hubba” of Cindy and Peter being forced to mash body parts together (just like how kids mash action figures together) but the more problematic implications an older reader would see? Nope.

    The problem is, I’m not sure Slott has the ability to write to an audience above that age.

    And yes, the chain of real estate title is not a “nitpick,” nor it is “minutia.” It’s especially not “head canon.” Chain of real estate title is a real thing. It exists in the real world, and it’s been shown to work pretty identical to the real world in the Marvel U. Wondering how Johnny could be ignorant of Peter purchasing the Baxter Building until Johnny learns about on TV is a valid question, especially because that very thing is the inciting incident that kicks off the story. Without the exchange of the building’s title, the comic would be maybe three pages, tops.

    Dan Slott’s dismissal of the real estate question just shows how biased he is, and enforces the impression he is wholly incapable of participating in anything resembling a civil exchange of opinion – or in this case, an exchange of facts about how real estate works.

    Meanwhile, I’m still more concerned about learning Parker Industries apparently supplies not just tech but weapons to SHIELD, and is apparently interfering in a sovereign nation’s politics. Complete with rather insulting “African warlord” stereotypes.

  8. How critical of a book can you be before it becomes just nitpicking? It seems Slott just assumes that every criticisms leveled at his book is a nitpick and people should just enjoy it for what it is, like a Michael Bay Summer Blockbuster.

    He also seems to be under the impression that all people on the Crawlspace do is nitpick his comics because they want to hate it, rather then have actual good critical points about the book. Which is, ironically, a pretty big bias on his part.

  9. @17 Chase The Blues Away: YES. I don’t think he takes constructive criticism very well. I should think the feedback from fans — and astute, intelligent, articulate fans, at that — would be very valuable.

  10. “Come on guys, what happened to the No Prize?”

    How awesome that Dan Slott has so little respect for the intelligence of his audience he has no problem writing illogical events thinking he can get away with them. And when people point out they can no longer suspend their disbelief, hey it’s THEIR problem for letting little, insignificant things like facts, reason and logic get in the way.

  11. I feel like a lot of slotts writing is taking years of continuity and just going against type to draw eyeballs and reaction be it a good story or not which usually is not in my opinion.

  12. Yes but as Dan Slott said on Comic Book Resources: “They lost it in a poker game.” “Come on guys, what happened to the No-prize.” His exact words and to just enjoy the ride and not look for what’s wrong with the story. Well, if you didn’t force the story, then no one would be looking for what is wrong in the story. You can keep people from being nit picky, but make it believable. Not two guys acting like 8 year olds and then saying: “Fight” like its Mortal Kombat. It just wrecks with a forced story plot where Johnny is acting like a drunk moron and Peter couldn’t just make a phone call to tell him what he was doing.

  13. Nice review as always, Andrew.

    Here’s a question that was a big sticking point for me: why was the Baxter Building even up for sale at all? As Reed and Susan Richard’s next of kin, isn’t Johnny Storm the legal owner of property? Which means if anyone, including Peter, wanted to buy the building, they would’ve had to go to him.

  14. Say what you can about the Zodiac subplot but you are trying to tell us Peter couldn’t contact Johnny in any way to let him know he was going to purchase the BB. Not to mention, how does Johnny have at least partial ownership of it? The BB was placed in the FF’s ownership years ago and if Reed and Sue are missing/presumed dead how does title not go back to Johnny and Ben? Yeah, the delay of SW has really messed up a lot of these stories.

  15. Hey, Dan, could you make Peter anymore of a Tony Stark persona? I mean, hell, purchasing something to save it was the exact plot of an Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes plot! It may have been a building instead of a business, but when we can see the exact same plot of a cartoon episode that focused on Iron Man, you have an insane problem.

    I know that Iron Man is their new flagship character of sorts, but good lord, you don’t have to make every character like him!

  16. A competent writer could have delivered this whole “story” in four pages. Waste of time indeed

  17. Thank goodness this didn’t end with Torch hating Spider-Man and vowing to destroy his life. Evil Black Cat is already bad enough… making the Human Toruch hate Spidey would’ve been overkill. The fight between Spidey and Johnny was kinda pointless. Both of them are in their 30’s for goodness sake… they shouldn’t fight like 5 years old children. And Slott’s Spider-Man needs to LAY OFF his jokes in situations like this. Jokes are important part of Spidey, but making at the wrong time and place only makes him look like a manchild.

    So Clayton tried to be a smartass and save the day despite Peter telling him not to? Well, screw him! What an idiot.

    The FF statue was nice though. Is Slott hinting at a possible return of Reed, Sue and their children?

  18. I really appreciate these reviews. Everywhere else I go to check out Spider-Man reviews I feel like they don’t get critical about it and just pass it off as a good comic. Here you guys get critical and I love that.

  19. So lovely to see douche manchild Pete is back and now he’s rubbed off on Johnny Storm. They were written like nine year old boys fighting over who gets to use the new baseball mitt and who gets stuck with the old one. And not particularly intelligent nine year olds. Why did Peter let Johnny learn he bought the Baxter Building via the media in the first place?! And why make the dig about the building!? He cares enough to make Harry “I’ve been a Goblin more times than I have waves in my hair” Osborn an executive, but can’t be arsed to give Johnny a heads up?!

    Also so lovely to see Peter’s sense of responsibility kick in. “SHIELD? You mean the guys trying to get back the incredibly sensitive data that I threw to Zodiac and then failed to get back, yet arrogantly promised I would retrieve it before the data could be decrypted but I’m too busy playing to the cameras in New York City? Screw ’em. Far more important to play pranks on Johnny and rough house with him, causing damage into the six figures and threatening the lives of my employees.” Nice to see the privacy of all his customers, plus SHEILD’s and who knows who else’s security, matters so much to Peter.

    And lovely stereotyping of Africans. Truly awesome. And yes, a foreign company coming in and providing “power” – and it’s implied Peter is giving power via weapons backed up by SHIELD, is a very tricky thing. Intervention in local politics by an American conglomerate does indeed break all sorts of international laws,not to mention it’s ethically wrong. And it smacks of Peter playing white savior, which is incredibly tone deaf on Slott’s and Marvel’s part.

  20. The entire fight between Peter and Johnny was extremely forced. “You call my old home, ran down, I’ll fix you!” I mean, come on, you know how hammered Johnny would have to be. Plus, we don’t know why the FF isn’t together, because it will ruin the ending to Secret Wars. Why they are launching Miles Morales new series in February because issue 1 gives away how Miles and Ganke are in the Nu616. The stuff with the Zodiac is interesting but way too easy they broke into SHIELD. Got the data and as you said, no back ups. That is way too easy. Also, Norman has his face wrapped up, because he changed his face again? Very lack luster issue.

  21. If Harry’s “alias” fools Norman, which I’m sure it will after SpOck’s dialogue and behavior impossibly fooled everyone Peter knew for all that time during Superior Spider-Man, this seems too much like the problem with Obi-Wan Kenobi’s “Ben Kenobi” alias from “Star Wars”. “Hey, isn’t that — nah, that’s not the guy we’re looking for. That’s Harry LYMAN, not Harry OSBORN. My bad.” That said, it is nice… I guess?… that Harry’s finally back in the comics, but this Iron Man take on Peter with Spidey as Peter’s bodyguard and running his own company is too different for my taste. Call me when we get Peter and Mary Jane’s marriage back, Marvel (and for good this time, not a “Renew Your Vows” mini-series/false hope tease either).

  22. I agree. I liked the previous two issues, but found this one to be rather meh. The focus of the issue is the fight between Johnny and Spider-Man and it jut never really clicked for me. I can’t put my finger on why.

    However, I know that Slott can write Torch and Spidey, so maybe the Torch will stick around a while. Maybe working with Peter’s ‘bodyguard’ state side or something. What do you think about a point series that shows Torch and Hobie doing some work in New York?

  23. I love how after the hooplah of Harry’s return to the book and the promotion of him as one of THE most important characters in the entire franchise who was absolutely ESSENTIAL to the success of the book, his return is essentially relegated to a “Oh, yeah, and…uh.. Harry’s still around.”

    I’m guessing any resolution on his kid’s storyline is dead and buried. Which I guess will disappoint the two people who were really interested in it.

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